Sunday, November 28, 2010


Every summer, my family spends a week at a lake that is filled with boaters, swimmers, water-skiers, and jet skiers.

(The water itself is a greenish brew of fish crap, duck poop, swimmers’ pee, and oil from the aforementioned boats, but that’s another story.)

On the first morning, I awake at 8 a.m. At that time, civilized people should be doing one of three things:
1. Sleeping
2. Having coffee and reading the morning newspaper
3. Exercising (walking or running)

But as I look out from the deck of our lakefront rental, I actually see people riding their jet skis at 8 a.m.!

I find this utterly confusing.

What exactly is this compulsion to get up so early and feel the need to jet ski? Is it really so fascinating that you just can’t wait to get up on that thing and zip around the lake?

Actually, I don’t understand the whole jet ski thing at all.

It’s not like your jet ski is taking you on some sort of adventure. You are not going to unexpectedly encounter some beautiful waterfalls or wildlife.

It’s a lake. You are basically riding in a circle. A lake is pretty enough, but one end of it looks just like the other.

Then again, all these kinds of activities hit me the same way. I will usually try anything once. I’ve rented a jet ski and I’ve rented a boat. But after you experience jet skiing or boating one time, what is the point of doing it again?

Sure, going on a jet ski is fun, but once I’ve tried it, what will I gain from doing it again? Is the second or third time on a jet ski going to be that much different from the first? Will it be more fun? No, it will be exactly the same experience.

What I find completely baffling is that some people will actually buy their own jet ski and drag it up to a lake every chance they get. Of course, that also involves getting a trailer for the jet ski, along with a vehicle capable of towing everything.

And then when you are home, you have to store all this stuff somewhere. Is it some sort of status thing to proudly display this bitchen jet ski in your driveway?

All I know is that sure is a lot of expense and effort for doing something that is really the same thing every time you do it.

Here’s a thought: Instead of spending money on the exact same activity, why not do something different each vacation? Maybe a little hiking at a national park, or exploring a new city?

But a jet ski? Come on!


  1. having sex is fun, why do it more than once?

  2. Well, there are several possible variables when having sex: positions, partners, role playing, toys, farm animals, etc. Many books on the subject that you might want to check out. Riding a jet ski? Always the same.